the beauty of rejection

there's a funny way people can be when it comes to dismissing certain things.

Take my job for example. Today was NYL's "call-a-thon." All that really means is that we would go about our regular activities today with a specific focus on being on the phone to make more appointments. Only problem with me is that I've exhausted most of my friends who are actually willing to sit down with me. The other ones just say "we already have that covered" and don't even give me a chance to simply explain to them what it is that I'm doing in the first place. I mean c'mon. I'm not forcing a scorpion down anyone's throat; I simply ask for 20 mins and feedback at the end. Hasn't my friendship with [x] merited at least that? I suppose not.

So, this leads us to what I spent a considerable amount of time doing today--cold calling. I liken to compare cold calling to taking a shower in ice. Sure...you are technically more hygienic as a result but it's the most miserable process ever. So, more than 100 dials later, I still didn't make any appointments. Needless to say, "no" was the operative word of today. (as an aside, two of the people that I called passed away 2 years ago so that technically was a no--'twas just extremely awkward).

Then, to kind of put the cherry on top, my would be date for a particular wedding at the end of the month just informed me that they would not be able to join me in celebration. Now I normally wouldn't be bothered by this sort of thing (after all there was no obligatory contract signed or anything), but the timing of this response was just awful. I asked her well over 2 months ago if they would go ahead and put it on their calendar. The response was a tentative one, "ok I'll think about it but I have to see because I never know what will come up in my schedule." Fair enough.

January finally rolls around and still no answer. February rolls in and urgency starts to set in. I finally remind her wednesday.

"I'll let you know by Sunday."
"With respect, is there any way you can be for sure? Because my friend is making name tags and she wants to know who my +1 will be."
"I'll just have to see. I don't know yet."

Fittingly, tonight my friend calls to see if there had been a response with my indecisive prospect. I call said prospect.

"Oh I don't think I can go because I have to work."
"Well is there any way you can work half a day? Or can someone cover?"
"No because we opened up our new store and no one will be there to cover for me."
"...ok."


Now, this is particularly irritating, not because she said no to me, but because of the timing with which it was executed. I honestly couldn't care less that she said no, but at least have the courtesy to give me (and my friend for that matter) the time to make amends in lieu of the lack of commitment. It's not like she didn't know about it. I gave her 3 blasted months to plan ahead. If she knew that there was no way she could get out of work, perhaps that's something that would've been useful several weeks ago before the new shop was opened? It's just annoying. Why can't people be, at the very least, courteous?





then there are those rides home by yourself. Those quirky little God moments where He intervenes and casts light on one's own faults. And, although, in both of these instances I've clearly been treated with less respect than I deserve, it doesn't give me any right to complain about anything. In fact, I have no grounds to even begin contemplating how unfair the situation is. Rather, how profound would it be if I just embraced the whole thing just grateful for the opportunities?

Instead of complaining about how many people won't set appointments with me, just being grateful that I have a job (especially in light of the ever increasing layoffs).
Instead of complaining about how stupid someone acted in terms of their poor handling of an invitation, being joyful of the fact that I'm able to celebrate the union of a dear friend?


Perspective changes everything.