suck at dating

Chalk another one up on the board!

Just finished probably THE most epic fail of a date with Kristy. I seriously don't know what masochist wiring I have inside to continue to endure such relentless coldness but Kristy is such an expert at it. It's kind of funny too considering I was listening to Black Eyed Peas before we left and i was all like "I'm not so confident tonight will be a good night."

It started predictably. She was tired and annoyed from her day at work and was late getting ready (no biggie). I go to pick her up and am absolutely enamored by how beautiful I thought she was. She walks right past me and gets straight into the car. Then she spends almost the entirety of the car ride talking on the phone or texting while we're driving there. I try to persevere and think good thoughts about our night, but it's pretty hard at this point.

Somewhere along the way, I stop to give her the flowers I bought for her. I was foolish enough to think that something like that would be special for her. After all, they were different and just her color (it was a purple/blue iris surrounded by a bigger version of baby's breath and some greenery). But the flowers ended up triggering a bunch of crap (ugh). She got kind of flustered and started saying how I don't need to get her flowers all the time and how she always feel bad when I get her stuff. I tell her that when you give gifts, it's not about the money that's spent--it's about the thoughtfulness of the gift implied. She gets mor pissed.

We got to our restaurant (Osterio del Figo) when things actually perked up just a little bit. She talked about what was pleasing and not pleasing to her decor wise and we continued to wait for our food. Somehow our casual conversation ended up turning right back to the flower I got her.

This is when the breaking point in the evening came. [It's kind of hard writing about this...because it's so emotionally taxing. How does one continue to purely care about someone when they repeatedly have utter disregard for your feelings.]

She ended up saying something along the lines of:

"Whatever fred. You think you know me but you don't know me. You think I like getting flowers and it makes me happy. I like getting flowers just not from you."

heart = destroyed.



We ended up not seeing the show at the rialto anymore. She wanted me to take her straight home. The car ride was her talking about how bad she felt for what she was doing. I told her that I still think she's wonderful. She said she wished I didn't try so hard. I said I wish I was worth a damn to her. She said she felt like such a bitch. I'm glad I DIDN'T say it's cause she was acting like a PMS-ing idiot.

And so that was my saturday night. I suck at life.