the to be continued

An interesting two days.

After the crazyness of monday, I supposed it was fitting that on friday I had to work with both parties for an extended amount of time. It was weird. There was tension in the air. There was political correctness. I wasn't as chipper as I normally was.

Instead, I found that I simply worked. And by work and mean work. I did my monkey starbucks chores the best I could. I kind of think that the whole jazz from monday was simply a ploy to get me to work harder and I was a sucker for falling for it. But man if it is that it sure is effective.

One thing I have come to realize is that just because I understand a concept that should be universally applied, I have no right to expect other people to make the same discovery. That is, just because I am able to look in the mirror and see my own faults, I shouldn't expect other people to look at their own mirrors. In fact, I don't think it's that big of a stretch to say that some people live their entire lives pointing a finger out the window into other people's lives and never once looking themselves in the mirror.

And, while that isn't satisfying to me, it's something I have learned to receive.

Another principle I have discovered as a result of this mess is that I am only accountable to God for me. I used to think God owed me explanations for why things happen. Why was I treated this way? Why did this have to happen to me? Why whatever. But what I've come to realize is that I have no grounds to approach God in that way at all. If the belief is that I cannot get to heaven through my own good works (ha!) but solely through Jesus, then there is a flip side to that. By believing that only forgiven people go to heaven would be to also believe that God is holy/righteous and owes nothing to anyone.

So, for me to demand an explanation, would be sorta like a little kid getting angry at their parents for not buying him a toy a target. The parent desires to give the best to the child...but that doesn't mean that the child always understands what's best for him.

The more I delve into this faith the more ridiculous it becomes. Awesome.