finding time to write more

One of the things I was kind of surprised with was who greeted me for my bday.

Lee was the first one (at a stunning 230 AM text message. I was sleeping but her thing woke me up and I didn't mind. I'm not sure whether or not it was planned or anything but I was quite honored that she would remember me. It wasn't anything special either just kind of a thing.

Then the slew of text messages and facebook postings followed. It's quite a warm feeling knowing that your life is meaningful to other people. I responded to everyone who texted me and eventually got back on fb just to respond to everyone on there too.

Then there was the one and only Ms. Porcupine [KT]. I knew heading into my bday that it would be unwise for me to expect anything one way or another so I was real guarded not to get my hopes up for anything. The weekend came and went and I didn't receive a text or phone call from her. Nor did I get a fb message. So, the last logical thing was to perhaps see if she would pay me back with my own medicine by leaving something for me at my house.

Nope.

I wasn't mad or offended or anything that she didn't so much as greet me...but it did kind of confirm that I, in all likelihood, don't mean a thing to her. It's quite likely that she's "moved on" from me...but what does that even mean in the first place? If we were never in a relationship, then she would have nothing to move on from. But, if we were good friends as our story is supposed to have gone, isn't it reasonable to believe that she would've done something?

I keep wanting to give her the benefit of the doubt (maybe she was busy? perhaps she had a special gift and wanted to give it to me in person?), but kind of gets me down. I don't mind living with the reality of knowing that she means more to me than I do to her...but it'd be nice to mean something to her. Even a little text message would have been great. But, when something isn't important to someone, it tends to get pushed to the side; and I guess that's my new home in her life.

Presents wise I did score a new camera! I even showed Praise to her grand content. I didn't really get anything from anyone else (Sam got me my favorite trident) but I'm still pretty content. The old mantra goes "the best things in life are free" and I can honestly say that's true with me this year. It would be nice to have new clothes and new shoes (and maybe even a brand new Babolat Pure Drive GT) but even more meaningful than that are the hand-written cards from Ms. Fortich. As well as the voicemail of Tita Christy and Lola Rochelle singing happy birthday to me via voicemail.

When you treasure that which satisfies, the delight is that much more intense.