Friday Night Thoughts

It is often those curious times of awkwardness that I find myself questioning myself the most.

Tonight, amid all the drunken revelry at Altobeli's, I sat surveying my surroundings. It was a company dinner yet I felt to affinity to said company. I felt no affinity to the people I was with. Don't get me wrong...I care very deeply for everyone I was with; however, the intrigue was that, were the circumstances left to me, I wouldn't be sharing dinner with any one of these people.

Alcohol truly reveals many of the hidden layers in other people. I experienced both ends of the spectrum tonight. Kelsey with his loud, uncontrolable exhorts. Sam with his reserved contentment. Faces were amber from constricted blood flow. It's no wonder why so many people boast of their greatest stories during drinking sessions.

All this time I wondered how Glorie was doing. I imagined what it would be like were she at my side. I started smiling as I visioned us talking about nothing at all (and my enjoying every minute of it). The reality settled in of course but my joy nonetheless reared itself out of nowhere. And, well, it made tonight more bearable.

The night ended with everyone wishing everyone a Merry Christmas and all the guests thanking my mom for her generosity. Being the only one who didn't have a sip to drink, I drove home. Everone laughed at how obnoxious certain people were and likewise lauded Steph for her rendition of Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas. I quietly listened and simply continued to drive.

And, somewhere along the way, I realized that this is precisely what my family is...and I couldn't be any prouder to be a part of them.