definitely wishing I could be normal

In continuing the thought from yesterday, I have unearthed even more evidence that I'm probably not from earth.

- I realized when looking at all my pictures that I don't have any pictures of friends. I don't really have pictures of people in general. There's the occasional group of friends here and there but I am mostly taking pictures of really random objects/things. Who does that anyway?

- I've never been the type to "party." All my friends are into letting loose and just having fun. My version of fun is simply laughing and doing something weird (like listening to a great story). Or, I choose to do stuff that's more meaningful...like write something to someone or Someone. I figure we only have a short amount of time here on earth so why waste it being self-centered?

- I just found out that if I don't produce 8750 of FYC by the end of may my contract will be terminated. Sweet.

- If I'm everything that Kristy wants in a boyfriend, why doesn't she want me to be her boyfriend? It just doesn't make any sense.

- Sometimes I just think and think and think about stuff and never just kind of sit back and watch. I enjoy figuring things out even when they aren't meant to be figured out. Like women. I very well may give up on love in general.

- And, for that matter, any hope that there is still a friendship left to salvage/hope for with her/them.

- There better be a heaven. All this patience better be worth it.



And in the end, I'm thankful that I have been graced with a modicum of insight to recognize, full and well, how arrogant I'm becoming. Out of my frustration due to my inability to correct certain aspects of my life, I've developed a chauvinistic mentality regarding my own intelligence.

How truly awesome would it be if, instead of just randomly blurbing my tangent thoughts in bullet format, I simply responded with confidence that I may not know as much as I think I do. And maybe, just maybe, God really does want the best for me and is writing my story in a way that's fitting for a unique little character like me. I'm sure he's having to make crossouts for the parts I keep trying to write myself, but in the end it's his epic and my job to be a supporting lead.

But I don't.