Friday Night Thoughts

I'm learning.

It's slow and it's ugly but there's progression. Much of the past week has been spent (what else) thinking through "the situation." I truly desire for all of my close loved ones to learn from this story. I hope it's evident, from what has happened, that people will really do anything to secure what is important to them. If it's money they'll show it. If it's Jesus they'll show it. If it's recovery they'll show it. The actions will be evident of what's important to them; even if they don't measure the cost of attaining it.

I suppose we'll enter a phase where we don't talk with each other. The sentiment being that they have already done everything that they need to in order to set the relationship right. If anything, I am the one holding back the restoration of the families due to my unwillingness to just "let go." I just wish I knew how to let them understand that to let go would be to trivialize the driver of the destruction. There can't be foundational relation building until there is mutual understanding of that truth. Yet in the end I suppose it will reflect poorly on me. No fair.

I still find it shocking that, as Christians, drama can escalate to the level to that of soap operas. If the creed of Christianity is to be taken seriously, there should be perpetually submission to God and each other. In humility, there should be a discovery of the prevailing love that won us over when we yet knew of Christ. The same regard should apply here. With people, drama is common. Yet we, as distinguished children of God, should be able to pierce through the veil of misunderstanding in order to promote unity; not remain distanced due to the inability to lower one's pride. There's no room for self in the kingdom of God.

That said, I have to start being more selfless. I have no right demanding God to make sense of my situation. I have to stop being so self-focused. There is no hurdle that I must jump through that will make this immediately go away. The remedy to the heartache has already come and risen. My joy should be completely proportional to my gratitude for what I have. Each question I have and every emotion I feel is completely legitimate. Yet, are they so significant that they take precedent over the story Christ is telling? It is only if I'm focused on the wrong thing.

I just hope that I'm not the only one trying.