Thought for food

I've had a bunch of time to think about life.

My life to be honest. Specifically everything that Kristy said. The problem is that I'm not liking what I discovered. There's a lot of ugly stuff just welled up inside of me. It's horrible.

The honest truth is that I'm still pretty hurt at everything. I could go on reexplaining everything but it wouldn't really do anything. The simple truth is that they don't really care that they hurt me. It's that simple.

Then, talking with Kristy tonight, it couldn't be any more clear how crazy she is about this other guy. I hope she's happy with him. And I especially hope that he deserves her. Kristy is a pretty incredible woman and she better not settle for anybody.

Thankfully, I can say tonight that I'm a little bit more peaceful. In the living room tonight we discussed a passage in Colossians 2. Paul basically makes the assertion that if we, "Christians", really are rooted in Christ the way we like to appear that we are, one of the natural overflows of that truth is that we would be overflowing with thankfulness. In other words, people who are really like Jesus are the most grateful people on earth.

I haven't been thankful in awhile.

But then again, I'm always learning. Perhaps this is no different. My goal is to simply be more thankful and maintain a bigger perspective. I hope to be more thankful. And I hope that it's a real gratefulness as well. Not one of those glib (oh yeah praise Jesus) but one of those things that are so flippin inspirational that you start to get curious how someone can be developed in such a way.

And it starts with being thankful for all the hurt that happened to me.